Answers are easy; solutions are challenging....
Relationships exist on many levels and for many reasons. I know people who don't want to go to hell so they do everything they can to "be good, do good and act good" so they can somehow be good enough to get to heaven by avoiding Hell.
They will DO ANYTHING except talk to God, much less Jesus and these people are very religious,,,,,
God see's their heart and their Intent; He meets them where they are at.
In all things regarding the Law, Relationships, Marriage, what is right and what is wrong it is easy to know the Facts from Scipture and to state them unequivocably. The facts are made plain and if we lived only by them alone we would not be discussing IF a person should "get married" or if communal living because society adapted to promiscuity is sin or not.
Of course it is. And we all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.
That alone is why we do get personally involved, because God is personal and is personally involved. HE is the "THIRD PARTY" in every relationship.
WHAT?....How so?
Well, Jesus lives in me. I know in part how he does and I can accept that part I undertstand because the Bible says and God confirms that IF we are Born Again of the Spirit then HIs Spirit is in me and if I have the Spirit I have Jesus because I asked Him to live in me.
I John is a good read to explain.
So if I have Jesus in me, what I do, involves Jesus too.
I can't tell another person WHAT TO DO, because all things "technically" are lawful to me, but not all things expedient, and I know God is at work in people to change them into the image of his Son and they may take a lifetime....
But what I can do is remind people that
1) God is real (really!!)
2) Our Father in heaven is personal and loves us.
3) Jesus died for us.
4) God is in us.
When people tell me issues and problems I ALWAYS know there is more NOT SAID and NOT SPOKEN then the person tells me.
Often in counseling they tell me later, sometimes years later as much as they are willing to say.
In this case I know there is more unsaid then the few lines and God knows so much better that HE can direct a person IF they want to know.
PROVERBS 3:5,6 tells us all we need to know because as we do as it says the Spirit of God can then direct a person and God wants to direct people. After all HE knows them better than they know themsleves.
I have to talk to God alot because Jesus is in me and I often do a disservice to Him in much of what I say and do and therefore talk to Him alot about grace and mercy.
When people want a reason to keep doing what they are doing they often turn to religion and try to ignore God in them and conscience.
According to Romans as I read it and in 35 years as a Born Again Jesus generation person I have never had a person NOT KNOW the TRUTH that was recorded in the Bible.
They always already knew what God has said and avoided often waht Jesus stated, but could quote what someone told them and often did. Especially if they like it.
Most of my counsleing is simple.
"What is God telling you to do" (they tell me)
"Then go do it"
If it is God who told them; the results are His and I can Proverbs 3:5,6 no matter the outcome.
The question more often is,
How real is Jesus to a person and how real God.
That is why I do, what I do, because He is real.